The everyday monsters in our lives

Lily was thankful that Joe was helpful in pulling her away and distracting her mind. She did end up laughing at the stories of the two rascal boys getting into all kinds of trouble. The story about the frogs was almost sad, but she supposed when you were a kid any day like that was an adventure. As they walked she asked about his upbringing a little - not going into details, but just wanting to know what kind of society he had been in. Of course if he stopped she would just take over the conversation,
telling some of her childhood stories. How one time she had gotten so upset about not getting her way that she had ripped off her diaper and marched outside only to find out it was raining and she fell in a puddle. She chuckled shaking her head, "I suppose we've both been born headstrong," she giggled.
Arriving back at the house she just called about her arrival, heading out to wash the clothes they had just bought. It at least felt really good to know that they had the clothes in place. When that was done she headed upstairs to paint with the notion that he could join her if he wanted to, unless her grandmother had an assignment to him today.

Her question about his upbringing did make him look a little withdrawn; Or at least he was considering withdrawing. But Louis had made it clear that it would only be good for him to be a little open about his past. So he made it simple. The kind of society that wasnt very open to other races than humans and a few of the good-natured races as well. He however didnt say much else and it was great that she quickly took a hold of the conversation to speak about herself. Her story surprised him a little and he chuckled. "I guess." he agreed.
Louis was outside but moved in as soon as she heard them. She shortly spoke to Lily before she went to Joe. She did have some things that she wanted him to do before the day was over, so he couldnt join Lily for her painting. For the most part was Louis trying to make Joe connect with his new identity. That meant everything that followed too. The enhanced senses, the tendency to be blinded by anger and frustration; which also was enhanced by the fact that he was Benjamin Joe Harris of all people. He sat in the garden with her, talking for the most part, but he quickly realized that she was trying to poke at him. Pull at things he said, make him a little agitated. He wouldnt really give in that easy, but it was like she already knew what to pick at to get at him.

In the city Cesare was still terribly busy. He had secured most of the deals, and he had made sure to get a suit tailored as well. He was considering ordering one for Benjamin as well, but not knowing his measurements could be difficult. Not only that, he had already spoiled him with a car, so he had picked out something smaller to give him so that they could match. Normally a vampyre wasn't really getting tired, at least not physically. Mentally was another matter entirely. He leaned back in his chair, drawing out a deep breath as he finally had a small moment just for himself. A tiny bit of rest. But it just made him feel idle, so instead he gave the cube a soft squeeze, smiling to himself a little before taking his phone with his free hand.

[Messages between Benjamin and Cesare]
[Cesare:] Hi, I finally got everything done for today.
[Cesare:] I'm sorry I couldn't pick up earlier, but I have time now if you still do?

He placed his phone in his lap, leaning his head back to look up at the ceiling. A part of him just happy that soon enough the wedding would come and he could be close to him. Biting his lower lip he considered telling him that he had gotten them a room at the venue. It was silly, because Cesare wouldn't sleep, and Benjamin probably had to head back straight after the party. But a part of him perhaps hoped that he could be granted just a night with him. He had seen that longing and sad look on the daemon's face when he had been there last, and he wanted to replace it with sweet moans and blissful smiles.

Cesare sighed as he saw the message. He hated that it had to be this way, but also found comfort that the daemon knew his limits. It was at least good to see. He gave the cube an extra squeeze, just to let him feel that he was there for him, even if he couldn't talk, he clearly wanted to support him.

[Cesare:] It's quite alright my love. We can always talk another time. Do not stress about this.

Being honest got you the farthest, and the vampyre had no intent of lying to him. It was hard having a relationship like this, but he also knew that it was important. Even if it sucked that he couldn't hear him or smell him all the time.

[Cesare:] Would you like me to tell you about my day through text then? Or I could send you this really cute picture of a cat I saw earlier?

They could even end the conversation right here if that was what the daemon wanted. There really was no pressure from his side. Getting up he went out on the terrace. He had stopped smoking. Maybe because that right now Benjamin's lips wouldn't taste of tobacco. How strange that his preference shifted so easily when it came to the man he cared so deeply for. Maybe it really was true love they had.

Seeing the messages pop up he smiled a little. But wasn't this a loophole? Benjamin had had an exercise today, and meddling now wouldn't result in anything good, Cesare was sure of that. But it would be one voice memo, right? In the grand scheme of things. And while it was hard to admit, he missed the daemon's voice as well. Missing hearing him and his stories or what he was tinkering with. How nerdy he could get with working out and cars. But he also had to think of the long game, and this would give them a foundation. It would truly help Benjamin find himself, and he struggled because he was selfish. As the memo from Benjamin popped up he listened to it and his heart started aching in an instant. He could hear that he was struggling, even if the daemon thought he was hiding it well.

[Cesare:] I will do it on one condition: if you are told to delete it, you will do so and inform me.

That had to do with trust on both ends. He wouldn't risk having Louis accuse him of sabotaging Benjamin's training. Taking a deep breath there was something specific he had in mind. Moving over he laid on the bed on his side. It would compress his lungs in the right way. Instead of a voice memo he turned on for the camera, though covering the lens so he could only get his voice. "Hello my love," his voice calming, soothing even as he smiled a little, "what I wanted to say was more than a voice memo could ever hold."
He guided him to go lay down on his side and close his eyes. And then he wanted him to take some deep breaths to calm himself. He checked if he had done it with an audio cue and while he couldn't get a reply in a recording, it felt more natural this way. "I want you to imagine yourself laying beside me," he said hold a slight pause, "or at least just listen to me as if I was in the room with you." It took a lot to hold back his emotions from overflowing but he could do it for this. "I love you, my otter, my life, my dear," he spoke tenderly, breathing out in a content sigh, "and I miss you incredibly much .. but we'll soon see each other again .. we'll celebrate the wedding of your sister .. we'll dance all night, hold hands, and I would be damned if I didn't steal at least a dozen kisses." He chuckled softly, hopefully it picked up on the microphone. "And if you think you'll be getting out of dancing then you'd be wrong."
He smiled before he looked at the length of the recording. "I have to go now, but I'll see you before you realize time has even passed." And with that he ended the recording, sending the file to the daemon. He pondered if he had been too strange. But his message had been from his heart, and that was what mattered in the end.

Cesare had hoped it had been the right thing to do. He wasn't really sure what else he could do to soothe his boyfriend. But not only that, soothe his own aching heart. It was hard being without the other, but he had also lived long enough to know that some things took time. Besides in the coming days he had plenty of things to attend to. Slowly but surely it was all coming together. He didn't hear much from from the daemon beside his angry reaction that he received in his messages the next day. He worried again. Worried that he had done something to mess this up. That he had been the undoing or perhaps pushed him over the edge.
After that he didn't hear much. It was almost like radio silence until a simple message ticked in. Seeing it he got up in an instant, heading to the location that had been shared. He felt like he was on edge, looking around in the hopes of spotting Benjamin somewhere. Or perhaps just catch a glimpse? He wasn't really sure if this was a test or a trick by Louis, but frankly if the daemon wanted him to come like this, he would do it. But only because of how much he meant to him. Cesare genuinely couldn't imagine continuing life as he knew it without him by his side.

When he arrived he barely got to open his mouth and greet him before he was pulled into a needy kiss. And how could he not return it? He leaned in, wrapping his arms around him only to pull him in closer. The whimper made him worry, and the admittance made his heart ache with worry before their lips greeted one another again. Breaking the kiss he placed his forehead against the daemon's, feeling his warmth, hearing his heart beat and the soft pants for air he could produce. "Whatever it is .. we'll figure it out," he promised him in a hushed whisper. He wanted nothing more than to soothe and comfort him. Was he enabling him? Perhaps, but he didn't know how else to behave. He loved Benjamin and if he didn't think too much about what he did, then Cesare would be sure to ruin himself trying to soothe the daemon he loved so dearly.
"But first you have to tell me what happened," he pulled away, looking at him, lifting a hand up to caress his cheek. He had truly missed him, how his cheeks flushed in those beautiful pink shades was one of his favorites, but his eyes were what he had had the hardest time remembering. Of course he knew what he looked like, but eyes were made up of so many colors that he felt like he could look into his forever and never find the whole palette. "I hope you haven't been staying on the streets .. so let's go to where you are staying, and we'll talk this through, alright?"

He could feel how eager he was, and how he wasn't considering how tight he was gripping his hand. But he didn't say anything, following him up to his room. His eyes fell on the vials, feeling a sadness creep up on him. Part of him wanted to ask him if he had fed today. If he had been while he had been gone. His heart almost couldn't bear it if he was starving himself. Moving over he sat down on the bed, looking to the daemon who quickly went over it all. As he finished he frowned, looking down as he slowly thought it over. Humming he eventually looked up at him as he nodded his head yes. "But you did promise me to delete it if you were told to," he said, which made him feel bad. He smiled sadly, reaching out for his love wanting him close. If he let him he pulled him down to sit next to him, taking his hand gently. He just sat there for a while, fiddling a bit with the daemon's fingers. It felt rash this decision, but he would also not go against Benjamin, and if this was what he wished for, then Cesare would simply have to adapt. It was a heavy burden to carry, knowing that the daemon beside him was still struggling, but Cesare was easy to take on things that could hurt him in the long run.
"If you don't want to go back, then that is a choice you make - and know that I will always support your decision," he said rather seriously before he hesitated, breathing out in a sigh. "But what do you expect me to do besides that?" He felt his emotions on his sleeves, and it was clear that being with Benjamin made him happy, but the prospects of what was going to happen now worried him. "Do you want me to force feed you on the days where you can't feed yourself?" He wanted to know what this would entail, and that wasn't even accounting for the fact that Benjamin was getting stronger than Cesare as well. "And what if you fight back? Hurt me on accident? .. I know I will always forgive you, but you are never kind enough to forgive yourself." Would that not strain what they had? He turned his head, moving a hand up to cup his cheek. "I want what you want .. but I want you to be sure about it, and not make this choice because you are angry," caressing his cheek before he leaned in for another kiss, giving his hand a squeeze. Maybe they could work something out with Louis? Maybe arrange that Cesare could come by as a reward for progression. But maybe the daemon was already set on what he wanted.

"And I'm not forcing you to," he said. No, Cesare couldn't make him think even if he wanted to, because this was something that the daemon had to make up for himself. He got up on his feet, walking over to the vials and grabbing one. He looked at it, inspecting it before he walked back over to Benjamin. He opened the vial, pouring the delicate soul into his hand, looking at the daemon with serious eyes. "Please eat this," he then said. Maybe it would just make the daemon more mad. "Show me that I can take you with me home after this .. give me a physical reason to believe that we can do this together," Was he cruel? And yet, was this not fair enough?
He moved down on his knees, sitting in front of the daemon that he wished so much good for. "Eat it, and I'll do my duties as your boyfriend and cheer you right back up." This was a plea. Cesare was welling up a bit, because this had been what they had fought about before he left. And even putting himself in that position to risk having him leave was traumatic for him, but he needed Benjamin to show that he was committed to this and that he would feed when he was with him.

The soul slipped away, and while it was sad to see, Cesare also didn't know how to help him. He was useless! He wanted to comfort him but the daemon grabbed his wrist tight, the vampyre not showing it, but it hurt quite a bit. His back against the mattress, he looked up at the man he loved, tears falling down his own cheeks but he was just quiet. He couldn't even sob. "My boyfriend isn't a monster," he said in a serious tone, his hand tensing a little while he was healing, but he was laying it as still as he could. "My boyfriend sacrificed what he was to save me .. and if you think I haven't thanked you for that every time I get a new day, then you're mistaken." Gritting his teeth, his hand moved up, grasping lightly at his hip, just holding onto him as he was afraid still of him leaving. "If you're a monster, then so am I .. so is Sadie and Martin .. so is Mark," he said, "we're all monsters, we've all done stuff we can barely hold in our bodies, but we do it, because nobody else is doing it for us."
He took a deep breath, closing his eyes, calming himself down. "If you enjoyed it; if you didn't even think twice before feeding after your change - that would've made you a monster .. but you're not." Could he not see what he was trying to say? The fact that he had his moral compass intact should be reason enough to not call him a monster. Moving his hand up under his shirt, he grasped softly at his skin finally opening his eyes to look at him. "If you were a monster there would be nothing stopping you from just taking my soul right now .. so do it .. prove to me that you're the monster you claim you are," taking his hand, guiding it to his neck and chin, opening his mouth gently, looking at the man he loved, "I'm utterly and completely yours."

The fact that Benjamin could even pull himself off of him right now showed a lot of progress from the daemon he had tended to in his hotel room. But he was still refusing to feed. He sat up, looking at his love. Getting up he went over, took another vial before coming over and sitting down on the floor. He opened for the vial, holding it neatly in his hand. "My soul .. or the vial .. either way you're going to have to eat," he was being dead serious right now. How could he even pretend to live if Benjamin was hurting so much. "I won't accept you refusing me," which was another way of saying that one way or another he was going to see that the daemon would eat. This wasn't how Louis taught, he was sure of it, but the daemon clearly hadn't grasped yet what consequences were. "Life is about choices, and I'm giving you one right now; pick the vial, and the two of us can work on this, with or without Louis' help; pick me, and it seals my fate." His eyes were soft, not angry at all or disappointed. They were just filled with the genuine care he had for the man he loved. "I was really looking forward to that third date," he smiled, closing his eyes, opening his mouth a little just to make it easier if the daemon should choose him.

He wasn't angry as the vial was smacked out of his hand, rolling around the floor somewhere. As the daemon leaned in, he wrapped his arms around him, humming softly against his lips. "You won't listen to me, my otter," he sighed, though something else was taking up his mind now that he felt the adrenaline in his body. He grasped at his hips, pulling him down into his lap, his jaw tensing as he had missed having him this close. "But I suppose you never will," he admitted. So what if this would ruin him. His lips were hungry, savoring the daemon's lovely taste as they sat there on the floor.
"Take your shirt off," he muttered, removing his own shirt rather hastily. He couldn't hold back anymore. It had been too long. And he had missed him too much. "I want you." Such a genuine plea from the vampyre that usually refrained from being so blunt that it was so obvious. Leaning in again he sampled his lips, licking them longingly for his taste.

Cesare had to grit his teeth, feeling how Benjamin's nails pierced parts of his skin, "careful my love; I'm more fragile than you now," he just reminded him, clearly neither angry or upset in any other way. In fact he felt more fueled by it. "Lube?" he just asked, needing to know before they went further. Sure, Benjamin was a daemon now and could handle things more rough, but he still wanted it so be good and loving. He wasn't looking to hurt either of them. Ushering the daemon to get out of his clothes and onto the bed, Cesare went for a hunt in the room, heading out to the bathroom where he hummed. He was in luck, but also a little surprised that this place offered lube to the guests. But perhaps that said more about their clientele than anything.
Returning he stripped naked himself, moving over to lay on top of him, wrapping himself up in the daemon, moaning softly at the skin on skin contact. He let them get used to it for a little before kissing him down his neck. "Does anything feel different or too weird?" He was just checking in. Preferences could change after a transformation, so he was basically just making sure it was pleasurable as ever. Reaching his nipple he hooked on gently, his hand moving down to touch the daemon's length, groaning against his skin as he did so.

The reminder made Joe more aware of his movements, more so his hands on the vampyre. “Sorry.” He muttered, even if the vampyre wasnt angry with him. The question about lube made him look around. “I dont know. Bathroom maybe.” He shrugged. He did do as the vampyre told him and undressed to get on the bed. He laid his head on the pillow, exhaling in a tremble. This would be new for him, he knew it. He waited rather patiently even if he didnt feel that patient.
When Cesare returned, he watched him undress, folding his lips shortly to wet them. He liked what he saw that was for sure. He soon got to feel the cold skin on his own, shivering and moaning in delight as he associated it as a human with something good, and now that it was enhanced, it left him shivering and trembling, goosebumps spreading on his skin. “It’s good.” He admitted, moving his hands up to touch the vampyre around his shoulders and back, looking at him with loving eyes as the kisses down his neck reached his chest. The hand touching his length was almost too much if the vampyre was also tending his nipple and Joe could tell from how his nails dug into the vampyre a little. “Slow, please.” He muttered, before it would overwhelm him. He looked at him with tender eyes, raw from emotion and crying. “I havent…. -since the change.” He admitted. If his face hadnt been red before, it sure was now. His whole body was actually quite warm as his heart pounded like crazy in his chest.

Returning he did take a second to just look at him. He was so beautiful. He could see those flush cheeks getting brighter and perhaps that was why he rushed to be with him on the bed. The reminder to take it slow meant he released both his and and his lips from around him. He pulled a little away, looking at him with tender eyes. The admittance was surprising him, "not at all?" He asked, because that could mean a plethora of things, in regards to how he would react. Leaning in he kissed him gently, "I'll take it slow .. I guess I'm just excited to finally be with you again," which didn't really excuse but more so explained. "I'm sorry .. let's try a little at a time," he smiled, not minding slowing it down. It would make it last longer.
His hands started exploring, making him feel how he slowly moved from area to area with a gentle yet needy touch. He was sighing, almost moaning from how good it felt to just lay here naked with him. "Do you want me to touch you?" He asked, kissing his lips tenderly, knowing that meant his hand would have to focus on only one par lt of him. If it was a negative he would just continue to run his hands around until he felt ready. His hand moved down slowly, caressing along his length, barely gracing him with his fingertips. "You're so wonderful," he muttered softly, looking at him with half lidded eyes, clearly enjoying himself very much. Grasping around his member, he just began stroking him ever so gently, pressing his forehead to the daemon as the feeling was almost unreal. Here he was. The man he had longed for for so many weeks now, finally being with him without anyone there to keep an eye on them. "I love you my otter." A sweet tremble left his lips then, just from being close to him.