Reality check - Bittersweet reminder[cw]

Hearing his soft chuckle made her smile against his skin, yet it really wasn't her intention to do this to him. She just wanted to kiss him for a while, not needing it to escalate, although it always seemed to end out like that with them. "You won't be getting my body tonight," she whispered in a soft voice against his neck, sighing as she felt like she wanted to. However she had gotten very strict orders not to by the priestess. "I have to remain clean for the ceremony," she said, touching his face gently. Perhaps he hadn't noticed, but they hadn't been intimate in over a week, the priestess' orders of course. And with the lack of sleep he had, she thought it was fitting to let him sleep when he actually could. As he spoke about eating she nodded, but she continued to kiss his neck in small and rather careful pecks. She wasn't trying to evoke any major feelings in him, although she felt herself so willing to give in. "Eat, my love," she whispered against his neck, encouraging him to just relax and have his soul. She still found the whole ordeal with souls confusing, but she rather didn't like thinking about it. She was just grateful for the fact that the vials existed so that he wouldn't have to actually hunt someone down. "And when you've eaten, you'll need to sleep - I can't have you falling asleep during our bonding," she said, the last part being more of a tease, but either way she meant it. She was excited about tomorrow, about what would happen once they had been bound. Most of all she felt rather giddy at the thought of giving him the surprise afterwards.

Buffy just enjoyed being here with him, and as he had downed his soul she pulled away from him, smiling rather innocently at him. To her it was a weird feeling, feeling like they finally had a little bit of space just to be theirs. As he got up and off the couch she frowned for a while, placing her head in a slight tilted position, she looked at him as he walked to the door. As he said she should stay where she were, she had just gotten up to her feet. She felt a shiver run down her spine. "In an hour or so?" she replied, however she didn't understand what was going on. As far as she was concerned, they were still under protection by Nova. The Order would have no way of tracking either of them, that much the celestial had promised them. "Speak to me please ... What is going on?" she asked in a soft tone, feeling scared to even think about her worries. What if the Order had found another way around, which she doubted, but until they were bound tomorrow, and maybe a couple of days after that, they were safe. Right?

The guy? What was his name again? Trent or something? She honestly couldn't remember as she had been so busy worrying about Baal's safety back then. Buffy stepped out in the hallway, taking Baal's hand and pulling him away from the door. "Nova isn't here," Buffy called out to the door, frowning as she wasn't sure if it was wise to speak. She felt like this was wrong. Aiden had spoken about this guy going home already, so what was he doing here and in front of the apartment. "She moved, I-I have the address," she elaborated. Was this going behind Nova's back? She couldn't tell. The two celestials confused her a lot. Placing a hand on her stomach she felt herself take a step back and away from the door further. Something definitely didn't feel right.

Came to warn them? About what? She felt frustrated that the guy wanted to play up this mysterious act, but she couldn't really do anything but stand back. The celestial's cold voice sounded so different from the soft and warm one that Nova always spoke to her in. Maybe it hadn't been wise to bring her counterpart here, but Buffy couldn't have known. All she had wanted was for Baal to survive, and he had, then that was the end of that story. What bothered her the most was that if this Trent knew that Nova had moved, then why was he banging so loudly on the door? They had nothing to offer him, nothing special, but his demanding voice sounded like an order from the outside. As he spoke about them being disposable, she wondered if that was how Nova saw them as well. Letting go of Baal's hand she watched with careful eyes as he unlocked and opened the door. Baal was as always towering over the other guy, but he didn't seem faced by it. Even going as far as pushing the tall daemon to the side and walking closer to her. In pure instinct she moved her arms to wrap around her stomach, protecting what her body knew was the most important thing right now. She looked up at Trent, gazing in to his cold eyes, and then he spoke of a pull, making her frown in confusion. "Thank you," she said in a rather timid voice. She didn't feel safe facing this brute of a celestial. Buffy had had some time to see how Nova moved, and sometimes it looked like she was a ballerina dancing along on air, but Trent was much more bulky in his movements. Her eyes flickered, seeing the men he had brought with him before her gaze went to Baal. "You had a warning?" she asked, trying not to make her throat tie in knots as she spoke.

Even though Buffy felt intimidated by his presence, she still stood her ground, hugging her stomach lightly. It was the only thing she really could do, besides listening to his words rather carefully. As he said something about a celestial she felt confused, mostly because she believed her child would be born either as a fenix or a daemon. She hadn't ever considered her being anything else. But for some reason she believed the man in front of her, and although he didn't look too worried about Buffy, the way his eyes almost softened up as his eyes wandered to her stomach made her trust him. Just a little at least. Remaining silent seemed to be the safest bet right now, but as he spoke about a bond she swallowed, looking at Baal as she felt torn and in distress. "What would the bond mean for Nova, you and ... The child?" she asked. He had said it wouldn't be a full bond, but would it not put Nova in danger? She felt confused and even more so because he seemed to know the child's gender as well. It made her swallow, looking at Baal. Had he nothing to say in this matter?

Buffy swallowed some of her fears as Trent started speaking about her dying. If she died, then she would break her promise to Baal, and if she lost the child she was carrying, she knew she would never forgive herself. She clearly could get no answers from her daemon, as he seemed to just look at her, and she felt burdened by having to make this choice herself. Baal finally seemed to react, but it only made Trent clap back with a notion of their lack of importance. “I’ll allow it, but I want to make it clear that it does not make our child your property,” she said in a trembling voice. Trent couldn’t just walz in here and think that he had some claim on the child, just because he offered a bond to keep it alive. “But what if you ended up losing Nova?” She asked rather suddenly, looking with confusion on the celestial in front of her. She couldn’t pretend to know much about him, but it was clear he was doing everything for the sake of his counterpart. Was he using her child to win his other half over?

Feeling her breath halter for a moment she thought all of this information through. It was not an easy decision, let alone one she had hoped she wouldn’t ever have been asked to make. She looked at her daemon, sad eyes as she knew that this might be their only chance to actually be a family. If she died, she knew Baal would blame himself, and Saoirse would be without a mother, and perhaps even a father. Her jaw trembled as she looked down to her stomach, caressing it softly as if to comfort the growing fetus within it. She already loved her, without knowing the child, she loved her so dearly. “I’ll accept your offer ... This child deserves the whole world if I could give it to her,” she said. She felt weak for giving in, but she also knew that Trent was speaking the truth. Buffy had hidden a lot of her hurt, tried not to whimper in pain when she felt her body weakening by the child growing in her. Perhaps she had hoped that the pain would be worth it, but if her child or her would die in the process, then it would’ve all been for naught. “If anything happens to her, I swear to the Old Ones ...” she whispered, but her words trailed off as she felt tears pressing on. She looked to her daemon, hoping that he would come and wrap his arms around her and tell her she was doing the right thing. Yet she had a feeling that Baal not acting right was the work of Trent.

Baal’s arms soon wrapped around her, but it felt wrong. Then his voice whispered to her what she had feared. Trent has somehow kept him from reacting. But she was not the type to wait. If their daughter was to remain safe, she needed to do this. She felt like that was the only option. Trent held out his hand and she looked at it for a while. What could Nova have offered them at this point? She felt scared, scared to lose her family that had barely been able to lay down small stepping stones. Heaitantly she took Trent’s hand, feeling almost a shift in her as the mark moved through her body. Though she didn’t feel the bond to him, she knew the child would. When it was done she watched as Trent left, feeling her heart race before she broke her facade and started crying. Crying because it seemed like no matter what she was going to lose what she loved before even getting it. Wrapping her arms around her daemon she sobbed against his chest, her body full of emotions as she just let it all out. “I’m sorry,” she kept sobbing in a broken voice. She had felt so torn yet so sure about what to do. Did he not trust her judgement? Had she acted selfishly? She couldn’t even tell anymore.

He was right, given the choice between her and their child dying or living with Trent being bound to their daughter it was quite the easy decision. His words were almost soothing, making her relax more. There was further between the sobs by now as he started stroking her behind her ear. Lifting her chin up she looked in to the sea of grass that was his eyes, reaching up to cup his face between her delicate fingers. She could already feel warmth radiating through them. Her skin having a faint glow as her body was no longer in so much pain. "I need to believe that it is so," she whispered weakly, taking a few deep breaths. Then she heard the noise of someone running up the stairs, and slamming the door open, there was the blonde haired celestial.

Nova's eyes flickered, looking from Baal to Buffy before she grabbed the daemon's arm, ripping it away from the embrace of the fenix. "You idiot," she mumbled as she ran a hand over the bond she had planted on him. "Why did you agree to that bond? Now ... Now ..." she mumbled before she looked at Buffy with angry eyes. "You don't believe I had a plan to save that precious little girl?" she asked frustrated. She felt her body just bubble up with anger, but it wasn't really because of Buffy. It was more so because of Trent.

Buffy didn't like how the mood of the room suddenly changed when Nova entered. She had hoped to get some rest, sleep out some of her worries and be in the arms of the daemon she loved so much. But as soon as the celestial started speaking, she felt less than. For the first time in her life she felt like she was truly being looked down upon for her actions, and it showed in how hurt her face was. But that was nothing as she felt her heart sink at how angry Baal sounded. To her, it sounded nothing like the kind hearted man that she was so deeply in love with, and yet here he was, getting angry at the celestial. Buffy understood his anger, but she couldn't voice that she felt it wouldn't help anything to argue. She had done what she believed was the right thing to do. She remained quiet, wrapping her arms around her stomach as Baal started to yell at Nova.

Nova was not having this attitude from the daemon, but she also knew it was because of Trent. Was her counterpart just set on ruining her plans? Grinding her teeth together she finally looked at Baal, her eyes void of emotion as he said that she had let Buffy go around slowly dying. Perhaps it was true, that Nova was a bit more carefree, but she wasn't cruel. She had been looking for a way, trying to use her time wisely so she wouldn't have to ask for Trent's help. "Do you honestly think I would've let her die?" she asked flatly instead of defending her actions. She didn't feel shame for what she had done, because without her, they wouldn't even have been here, and Buffy would've been found by the Order and slaughtered on sight of her stomach. The way the daemon was towering over her didn't really face her, as she straightened her back, scoffing at his words about sharing his child. "I wasn't planning on making any claim to that child, she will bear no resemblance to me, only have some of my DNA that would allow her to be safe," she replied in a cold voice. Nova knew it was not in her to have children. She might dream about it, but a celestial child could not sprout without a partner. "My DNA is the only thing between that child getting slaughtered and living a full life," she said, looking straight in to Baal's eyes. As she looked to Buffy, her eyes softened up. "I was trying to find a solution that wouldn't involve Trent, find a way to keep both you and that little girl growing inside you healthy and alive; but I guess you don't trust my judgement," she said, feeling rather hurt by the fact that Buffy had just accepted the deal. She then looked to Baal, reaching out her hand to him. "Let me remove the bond he put on you, I can't remove the one he placed on the child, but I can remove yours and place it onto myself," she said, her voice breaking a bit as she knew it would mean he would be able to control her for a while. It would just be how it was.

Buffy felt a knot in her throat, looking down as Nova spoke to her, because she felt like a child getting scolded. What was she supposed to reply with? She barely knew the celestial, and pretending to trust her wouldn't end well. She was grateful for what she had done, how she had saved not only Baal but also their child. But right now she couldn't find her words to either yell or speak. Right now she didn't feel safe, and perhaps it was because she had never seen Baal like this. How he could yell at someone and let his anger bubble up like that. It scared her. If she was to bind herself to him, she was afraid that he would ever unleash that anger on her.

"I'm not leaving until I remove that mark," she said in a firm voice. Nova was not taking no for an answer, and especially not from a daemon who believed her to be evil. "If I don't remove it, you might end up strangling your wife to be in your sleep," she said in a cold voice. Then the sound of a faint sob was heard as Buffy covered her mouth taking a few steps back and away from the two arguing. The celestial could feel how sad Buffy was, even shedding a tear herself as she looked down. "I don't trust Trent any more than you do, but I at least know what he is capable of, and if he wants that child, rest assured he'll not hesitate to kill both of you and take it for himself," she said.

"Your anger right now is what is fueling you, and that is because of Trent," Nova said as she could feel his anger because of the bond. She could also feel how he actually wanted to hurt her for even insinuating that he might hurt the fenix. He stated once more that he couldn't trust her, and that was fine with her. However she refused to leave them unattended while Trent's mark was on Baal's body. "Just because you wouldn't, doesn't mean he wouldn't," she said in a cold voice, looking to Buffy shortly.

The fenix looked at her daemon through wet eyes, feeling her emotions bubble up. "What if Nova's right?" she whispered, her voice broken and she was clearly struggling to speak. She was scared, of course she was, because in her eyes her daemon had always been understanding and logical. Not spiteful and angry. She looked down herself, seeing how her body was actually shaking. Was this her life from now on? Was she going to feel scared that her sweet daemon could flip in an instant and lash out in pure anger?