They all grow up so fast

Saoirse had grown up quite fast. Just within a few months she had looked like a girl in her early teens. Now she looked more like a young woman, but the change for her had been gradual enough for her mindset to follow. She was smart, rather intelligent considering she was but a mere four or six months old. However to avoid confusion they had placed her age at 17 for the school to accept her, along with a fake birth certificate. While she was making a lot of friends, she also noticed things that others didn't. She saw how some of her classmates stared at her, and she had gotten rather self-conscious, believing it was her pale silvery marks on her skin that they were staring at. Today she had riled herself up so much that she had simply gone back to bed as soon as her parents had left. Buffy had gotten a job in Central and Baal was trying to reshape the Orders of the daemons. As the shirt was tossed at her, she hid away under her covers, mumbling something about letting her sleep in forever. It was very unlike her to not just jump out of bed and be ready for the day. "I don't want to go to school today," she mumbled, peeking over her duvet to look at Amos. He was her big brother and had always been there for her, but lately things had changed. He had started to move away when she wanted to snuggle up to him when watching a movie. Connor did the same, and she was starting to wonder if they didn't care anymore. The two guys had been there for her always, and she felt herself so drawn to them, so when they moved away it stung a bit. "Can't we stay in? We could watch a movie and I could snuggle up next to you, like we used to," she pleaded. She couldn't understand, but how could she? She had no idea about what sexuality was, much less what sex actually was. Buffy had been meaning to talk with her, but things always got in the way. "Or we could go for a drive? The beach in Western should be pretty much clear of tourists by now, and we could have the whole place to ourselves?" she suggested. Anything but going to school.

Amos was good at cutting straight to the case, and as he asked why she didn’t want to go to school, she shrugged and looked away. “I don’t know ... I just always feel like people stare at me, and it feels weird,” she confessed in a soft mumble. While Saoirse looked and spoke like a young woman would, there were still so many things she didn’t understand about it. “I just want to ... Not stand out for a chance,” she said, looking at Amos with pleading eyes. However she should’ve known he wouldn’t budge so easily. He mentioned her mother, making her look down a bit shameful. All she wanted was for her mother to be proud of her, but she felt like it was hard to focus in school, when the whole world was such a mystery. She wanted to travel, to see the world and explore things for herself - not read it in a dusty old history book.
As he pulled the duvet off of her she groaned, turning over to plant her face into her pillow. She was sporting one of her father’s old t shirts and a simple pair of underwear. “Connor would’ve let me stay home,” she complained, but she knew it wasn’t fair to compare the two. She sat up, looking at Amos with a pouty lower lip as she reached her arms out to him, but they quickly dropped as she realised he wouldn’t come to her. She felt saddened by it, because growing up he and Connor would always be the first to pick her up and hug her close. Looking down, she folded her legs, her fingers playing with a loose string from the shirt. “What is going on with you? You won’t hug me, and every time I try to get close to you, you start to evade me,” she said in a sad voice. She didn’t understand, because how could she? She saw her two brothers as people she wanted to be close to, but they refused. “Am I not exciting anymore? Am I too boring?” She asked, trying to figure out why they took their distance. Frowning she wrapped her arms around herself. “Is it because of how I look?” She asked, feeling the insecurity sneak it’s way in to her mind. She looked at her white marks, pulling a bit at her skin. If they weren’t there, would he be close to her? Would he hug her like he used to?

He didn't reply, and when he tiredly said there was nothing wrong with her, she didn't believe him. She looked down, feeling that no matter what she did, he wouldn't give in. All she really wanted was to stay home, and couldn't that be fine for just one day? Everyone else in her class seemed to skip days whenever they felt like it, so why wasn't she allowed to? His suggestion made her sigh, because he kept speaking about her being a young woman, yet he offered things to her like she was a child. What was she to believe then, when he said one thing but did something else. As he left she sat for a while, looking at the string she had been playing with. She was sick and tired of these games, annoyed that they wouldn't tell her anything. Biting her lower lip, she mustered to climb out of bed, standing for a while, looking at herself in the mirror. Walking to her dresser she looked at her clothes, swallowing as she found would hide most of her marks and got dressed.
She was out by the car not long after she had finished brushing her teeth. Opening the door, she sat in the passenger's seat, looking at her hands. She could still see the marks, pulling at her cardigan to hide them away. "I know I'm being a brat, you don't have to tell me," she mumbled, looking out the window as they started driving. She felt a knot in her throat, and her stomach was hurting. Feeling tears in her eyes, she tried to wipe them away as they began to fall. "Amos, please ... I don't want to go to school today," she whispered. It was very unlike her, but she just couldn't get out of her mindset. She knew Connor was at school too, but he went to a different one. Right now she just felt so alone, biting her lower lip as she just looked out the window. "I promise I'll go tomorrow, but ... I don't know, I just ... It hurts in my stomach and I really don't want to," she said. She knew he would probably be harsh, but she had reached a point to where she was scared to get out of the car. Reaching over, she placed a hand on his arm, scared that he would pull it away, but she needed some sort of comfort right now.

It felt like a relief when he took her hand, because that small gesture made her emotions well up a bit. She looked down, sniffling a bit as she adjusted her shorts with her free hand. Although it was summer, she liked to cover up her upper body more, and she did it more frequently as of late.
As he parked the car she could feel her heart race. Her stomach was still hurting, and she was holding a hand over it, pressing her shirt to it to make it stop. However it didn't. Amos spoke, and she looked at him, er green eyes shining like two emeralds in the sun as he said that she could join him. The pinch of the cheek however made her a bit confused. She honestly didn't know what to do when he did stuff like that, but as he got out of the car, she followed him. The library was soon before them, and the group of friends seemed rather large. Saoirse couldn't help but stare a little at the girl ran up to Amos, swinging her arms around him and giggling. She felt a knot in her throat again, looking away as the girl seemed to be defensive in her gaze. Looking down to the ground instead, she decided to remain silent as Amos introduced her. One of the boys grabbed her hand, kissing the back of it and she looked at him a little surprised and scared. It felt strange. Kisses. Because she couldn't feel the tingles that people spoke off when they got kissed. While she wasn't looking at Amos, she was listening to what the girl was saying, feeling her heart grow a little heavy, yet she didn't know why. She should be happy that Amos had someone like her mother and father had each other, yet she felt strangely robbed. Of what, she couldn't be sure.
One of the guys asked why she was skipping class, and she looked at him with an apologetic smile. "I'm just trying to avoid a classmate, that's all," she said, frowning at her own words. It was true that there was someone she was avoiding, but they weren't hurtful or mean. They just stared a lot and it made her uncomfortable. "Besides, history class and me don't go well together," she said, her lips pulling up in to a soft smile. It was still true what her mother said. When she smiled, the rest of the world seemed to stop for a second to take it in. Saoirse was beautiful, and she had something magnetic about her, something that just lured you in.

The girl knew that her time with Amos in such a way like this was limited, everyone knew that the daemon shifted between girls like they were simply outfits. She just wanted to make sure that the time she had was well spent before her heart would be broken. And this Saoirse girl definitely had to keep her distance. Amos shrugged at the girl's words and looked down at her, "Maybe," he said with a smile but somehow he was holding back on being all sweet and nice with Saoirse here.
The guy nodded and while the two others seemed to drool as they looked at her with big admiring eyes, the third seemed unaffected, if not indifferent since she arrived. "Is he or she annoying you?" he asked, tilting his head a little, but then she spoke of history. "That's me and every class," he said with a chuckle, leaning back against the wall before he popped a cigarette in his mouth. The girl complained in a groan and started pulling at Amos' arm, "Let's disappear for a second," she purred at him, but he just looked at the two droolers and how they were looking at Saoirse before he shook his head, "I'll make sure dumb and dumber doesnt do anything," said the smoking guy, sending Saoirse a friendly smile.
Amos sighed and then looked at Saoirse, "I'll be back soon," he said right as the girl started pulling again. The smoking guy started blowing rings in the air as he seemed to be thinking. "So are you actually Amos' sister or is it just some big ploy?" he asked, narrowing his eyes a little at her. "Amos just seems.... I dont know, I've never known that he had a sister he cared for," he added, frowning a little to himself.

Safe to say, Saoirse felt a little out of place, but as the third guy started speaking she couldn't help but smile a little. "I don't know ... I just don't really like it when people stare," she said, shrugging slightly as she wasn't really in the mood to explain everything. Frowning a bit as the third guy said he would protect her, she turned her head a little to the side. Mostly because she didn't understand the implications. She looked at Amos as he was pulled away, and while she didn't know what they were going to do, she felt her heart ache. Looking down she wished that Connor was there. He was always so cheery, and she just felt whole when the two guys were close to her. A strange feeling to put in to words. The guy smoking, she moved closer to, jumping up to sit on the half wall that divided the school from it's gardens. Looking out she saw a P.E. class run by.
"My family is a bit complicated," she confessed with a faint smile on her lips as she just looked out at the scenery. "But it doesn't really matter ... I don't think he likes me anymore," she confessed, playing a bit with the sleeve of her cardigan. "We used to be rather close, but recently he won't even look at me and I don't know what I've done wrong," she said, breathing out as she felt so confused and heartbroken. Closing her eyes shut, she just looked at the insides of her lids as she tried to calm herself down. The hurting feeling in her stomach was still there. "I honestly didn't want to come to school today ... I just, I don't know, do you ever feel like you just want to disappear?" she whispered. She didn't know why she was opening up, but she guessed it was because she couldn't talk to her two brothers. "Like people stare at you, but they don't really see you?" she said, tugging her cardigan sleeves over her hands and wrapping her arms around herself.

"All family is complicated, some way or another," he said with a trying smile, that said that he knew how she felt. He looked at his cigarette for a moment before he took a long drag and leaned his head back against the wall. Instead of interrupting her, he just listened on and exhaled the smoke slowly. He shrugged when she couldnt figure out what she had done, "It's Amos. Sometimes you just have to look different and he'll be annoyed," he said with a chuckle, but sadly it was true. Her whisper made him frown a little, "I didnt hear all of that, but yeah I do get that feeling," he said, rolling his cigarette between his fingers. It wasnt really allowed on school ground, but obviously he wasnt one for rules. "Not many people stare at me, I'm afraid," he said with a small smile, but it didnt seem to bother him really. He looked in the direction Amos went, "It's hard to be noticed when you look like a neanderthal next to Mr. Get-all-the-girls," he said before he looked back at Saoirse. "I dont know what it is he finds so fun in it, the whole no strings attached," he admitted before he drew the last drag of the cigarette, to then flick it as far as it could fly before hitting the ground pretty far away. He scoffed in his own little victory and exhaled the smoke slowly.

Saoirse smiled slightly as he said it was Amos. It was true, Amos was often a bit all over the place, but looking back she had never seen him act like that around her. Sure he could get mad at their father, or frustrated with her mother, but he had always smiled when he looked at her. Now it just felt like a distant memory. She craved to have her brothers close once more, almost desperate to just feel whole, but they kept pushing her away. She was afraid that she was going to break down if they continued like this.
As the guy spoke about being noticed she frowned, following his gaze as she felt her stomach twist and turn. "If you want I could stare at you and you could not stare at me?" she suggested with a small chuckle, but she didn't really know what she wanted. Saoirse was so confused, mostly because no-one told her anything. A sentence stood out to her, making her frown. "What do you mean by no strings attached?" she asked rather confused, tilting her head to the side as she looked at the guy. In her mind she was imagining sewing or something of the likes.
"What's your name by the way?" she asked, looking at the guy with a wondering gaze.

He thought about her suggestion but then he shook his head with a soft smile, "I enjoy the shadow," he simply said and sent her a wink to let her know it was all fine. He looked back out on the empty school-yard, until her question made him frown a little confused before he looked at her, unsure if she was joking or serious. Her confusion was answer enough and he sighed deeply, "Holy shit, you must have lived under a rock till now," he mumbled, but he wasnt trying to be mean. He ran a hand through his hair, "Uhmmm. It's when you are with someone but without the intention to actually be with them. You know, it's just fucking and acting like they're a thing till he decide they're not," he tried to explain, but he hadnt ever had to explain the expression before. "You can just call me T.J. My name's actually just Tyler Johnson, but I never liked Tyler, or Johnson for that matter," he introduced himself, before he shrugged. "Saoirse is a special name. Serrrrr-shaaaa,, how is it spelled?" he said before he scoffed, "How many times has a teacher mispronounced that?" he asked with his head slightly tilted.

His reply made her frown, because now more questions came in to her head, but she just nodded, deciding that now was not the right time to ask such things. Perhaps she could ask Amos later, seeing as he apparently knew about it too. "Doesn't sound nice," she simply said, playing with her cardigan a bit more.
He introduced himself, making her smile as she reached her hand out to greet him properly, just like her father had taught her. "Nice to meet you T.J.," she said in a soft voice. Noticing her sleeves riding a bit up her arms, she finished the handshake a little early to cover her skin up again. Amos had said that she should not care what other's thought of her marks, but she didn't want to scare Tyler away just yet. He seemed like a nice guy, and she might have the chance to gain a friend. As he pronounced her name she chuckled. "S-A-O-I-R-S-E, and yes, teachers can't really seem to get a hold of it - One teacher even gave up and just called me Sara," she said with a faint smile on her lips. She looked to where Amos and that girl had went, wondering what they were doing, and why they needed to be alone.
"Do you do the whole no strings attached too? Is that, like, a normal thing?" she asked a little perplexed. She didn't like the implication, that a person was just with another one and it wasn't because of love. Perhaps it was because she had grown up around her parents, how loving her father was to her mother. How they seemed to work together despite the struggles they both had. "I don't know, it doesn't sound nice to me," she confessed in a small chuckle, looking down again.

When she wanted to shake hands he looked a little confused. He wasnt really the type to shake hands, not ever had he had to, but he wanted to not make her feel weird, though he started believing more and more that she might be a bit of an oddball. He shook her hand and noticed the mark just as she did, but he didnt want to dig into it. He rather shifted the conversation to her name instead of exposing her to something that would make her feel weird. The dumb and dumber just stood and were drooling as ever in their mesmerized states but T.J seemed to just ignore them. He rather paid attention to Saoirse, and what she was saying. "Sara," he repeated in a chuckle and shook his head as he rolled his eyes.
He popped another cigarette in his mouth as he thought about her question, looking up at the sky for a bit. He sighed before he shook his head, "It's quite normal, but I prefer keeping romance alive," he said, nodding to himself as he lit his cigarette, looking at her for a moment before looking back out on the yard. Some people were passing through and they seemed to stare for a moment but only at Saoirse. Tyler wondered what the deal with that was, because he didnt seem to have the same need. "Well, if it works for both parts, then I dont see the problem in it," he then said with a shrug.
Amos returned after a while, the girl latched onto his arm, their hair ruffled up a little while it seemed that a big bruise had appeared on Amos' neck. He didnt seem to happy as he pulled his arm from the girl when she tried to snuggle closer, "I told you to not leave any marks," he mumbled in annoyance, looking at Saoirse and Tyler. Tyler just snickered and seemed to mind his cigarette.

Saoirse didn't know how to feel about it all, and the more she thought about it, the more her stomach seemed to hurt. Perhaps she was getting sick, but it was hard to tell with her. "I wouldn't want that," she admitted. Just thinking that it was normal made her sick, frowning as she looked down. Was that what her and Amos had been, just some no strings attached kind of deal? Thinking about it stung in her chest and as Amos came back with the girl she noticed the bruise right away. "Are you alright?" she asked, jumping off of the small half wall, walking over to Amos. However she stopped halfway, letting her hand fall down her side as she looked down. He didn't want her close, she just needed to remind herself that. "I'm ... I'm going home," she said, feeling like her body was burning up with some sort of fever. Frowning, she wrapped her arms closer around herself as if to keep from touching him. Sending him a brief look she walked off.
Standing by the gates of the school as she found her phone. Would Connor even pick up if she called him during these hours? She breathed out and decided to give it a shot. If the phone went to voicemail she would just hang up, standing for a while as she didn't exactly knew how she could get home. If he by chance picked up, she would breathe out in relief, however her voice sounded tired. "Connor ... Could you maybe come pick me up? I-I don't feel so good and Amos is with his friends," she said, feeling guilty for even asking.

"That's completely fine," T.J assured her with a trying smile, but he noticed how she didnt seem comfortable anymore. He couldnt help but wonder, but as Amos appeared, it was much more funny to point out that everyone was seeing the mark clearly. Amos stopped dead in his tracks as Saoirse approached him, looking at her with a frown as she seemed to stop on her own. "Saoirse..." Amos tried as she walked away but he didnt even know what to say really. That their bond was making him feel the things his mother had worried about? That he wasnt someone who wanted that sort of thing for himself, so the whole ordeal just made him feel less like himself? How could you explain that to someone that had lived for 6 months and not yet found out what attraction meant?

Connor was busy reading some homework through since there was a hole in his schedule due to a sick teacher, he wanted to spend all his time on studies effectively and not stray and fall behind. Well, that was till he felt his phone vibrate in his pocket and he could feel that something was off. He picked it up to see Saoirse's number, sighing before he picked up. He listened to her and frowned a little when she didnt sound well. "Stay where you are. I'll come," he said, closing his book as he then stopped for a moment. "Are you alone right now?" he asked, clearly concerned. His mother had warned him about how hybrid's between the rivalling species were viewed and he didnt want her to be all alone.

Saoirse didn't want to hear any excuses. She felt unwell, and she just needed to get away. Mostly because she felt like something weird had happened between Amos and that girl that seemed to always look so angrily at her. She didn't feel welcome any more, and although Tyler was quite friendly, she didn't feel right. She had thought that spending some time with Amos and his friends might cheer her up, but all he had done was going off to somewhere with the angry girl and pretty much ignore her.
When Connor picked up, she felt on the brink of crying, because she felt so confused with all of these emotions. "I'm ... I'm at the gates, and yeah, I just ... Connor ... I just want to go home," she said trying not to cry over the phone. Maybe she was acting childish, and maybe Connor hated that, but she just needed to feel safe. Was that not allowed either now? Could she not be her own person and have her brothers in her life, was that what Amos had tried to say? "Please hurry," she said, feeling so lost. The world was so vast for her, and yet as brave as she thought she was, on the inside she was still that little girl sometimes.

He sighed when she said she was alone, feeling himself worry more and more. What was Amos doing? He couldnt understand how the daemon's mind was wired together at times, but as pushy as Connor tried to be when it came to the affection she showed, his spine wasnt as strong as Amos'. He cared deeply and he couldnt help but show it, despite how it was making him feel. Most of the time, he just wanted to push her away because he knew how young she was and in all senses, what he felt was just... wrong. "I'll hurry," he assured her before saying his goodbye to finish packing up.
He hopped on his bike and biked as fast as he could, thanking Verity that it was mostly downhill to get there. He wasnt in a fancy car like Amos, and since it was summer, he would rather use his bike than do public transportation. It was only when he would help Saoirse get to school that he'd go on the bus. It didnt take long before he saw the school, going faster till he reached the gates where he jammed down on the brakes, making a tight squeal from the tires sliding on the ground. He was heaving for air as he looked at Saoirse with deep concern. "Alright, I'm here," he said in a hasty breath, getting off his bike before kicking the metal stick down to keep it standing on it's own. He turned to her and hunched forward for a moment to help himself catch his breath faster. "Home, yeah?" he asked as he looked at her.

Thankfully she didn't have to wait long, and that was maybe for the better, because she was slowly starting to crumble. As she saw him pull up she wanted to run in to his arms, bury her face in his chest and just let it all out. However the fear of being rejected and pushed away was too great for her, so as he asked if they were simply headed home she nodded. Her parent wouldn't be home before supper time, and once she got home she would make a call to each of them, telling them that she was a bit under the weather. She took a careful step forward, but her body was shaking pretty badly. It hadn't just been not wanting to go to school apparently. "I don't feel so good," she said in a broken voice, feeling tired and dizzy, but it was simply because it was the first time she was experiencing actually being sick. Everything was new for her, but she wanted things to go back to how it used to. She wanted her brothers to look at her and still smile, not look away in disgust at what she was growing in to.
Swallowing she followed him as he led the way, still holding her arms tightly around herself. Her stomach was still hurting, and everything was just so strange. What had Amos been doing with that girl and if she had hit him, why was he not angrier? It was all so confusing. "I'm sorry," she mumbled. Did he feel obligated to come to her because they were family, or did he genuinely want to be seen with her? She couldn't tell, and the fear that she might be losing both of her brothers made her even more sad.

He nodded when she said she wasnt feeling well, but it wasnt that she had needed to say it, because she really wasnt looking that well. He looked up towards the school, wondering how Amos could just have ignored this when it was clear that she wasnt well. He shook the thought out of his head and led the way, since he didnt have a car, it would be better to just get going and get her home. He pulled his bike up on the sidewalk and looked ahead, frowning a little as she mumbled an apology, "Dont apologize," he said sincerely. Unlike Amos, Connor was kind by heart, even if it was bad for him to be that way.
He grabbed a bottle of water from the side of his backpack and offered it to her, thinking some water would help her feel a little better, "Did you remember to eat your breakfast?" he asked, thinking that she might have forgotten and that was why she wasnt feeling so well now. "Listen, Saoirse. I know that Amos and I are acting weird lately. But I dont know how to explain it to you. It's not because.... there's something wrong with you. Not at all. We just feel like it may be us that there's something wrong with," he then started explaining, since he knew Amos probably had been quite crude to her with his rejections. "It's just not like when you were just a child. You've grown now and... some change came with that that neither me or Amos can find heads or tails in," he then said truthfully. He hoped that there was some sense to his words, though he wouldnt blame her if it sounded messy.

"I forgot ... Amos basically had to pull me out of bed because I didn't want to go," she confessed, taking the water bottle and taking a few sips of water. As they walked she just felt the tension between them, and she hated it. She hated that she couldn't take his arm or even hug him anymore. So when he started to speak she just looked down as she put one foot ahead of the other. If it wasn't her, then what was it? She couldn't understand what he was saying. As he said it wasn't like when she was just a kid, she held her breath for a while. Even though she had to listen to those words over and over, it didn't hurt any less. "I just don't understand why I can't even sit next to you before you start moving away," she said, swallowed as she felt the hurting in her stomach being helped a bit by the water she was drinking. "Both of you keep saying I'm grown up, but you keep treating me like a kid; It just feels like you are punishing me for something I did wrong," she confessed, handing back the bottle. She would have to grab something from the fridge once she got home.
They walked for a bit more, her frowning slightly as her head kept turning. "Is it because you want no strings attached?" she asked, clearly not understanding the saying fully. That reminded her of something. Something she probably needed to wait to ask for until they reached home. "Because I love you both very much, but if you don't feel the same, then at least tell me," she said, biting her lower lip as she fiddled with her cardigan again.

"Then it's no wonder that you're not feeling well," He said with a small smile as he shook his head. Of course had Amos not thought that she would need some sort of sustenance to start her day. He felt more and more like he was going to argue with the daemon about how they should take precautions for the young Saoirse. This wouldnt have happened if she was still a kid, he just knew it.
He clenched his jaw when she pointed out what they were doing, sometimes he just wished that she would know as much as the other 17 year olds, but he couldnt blame her when she was only 6 months old. He ran a hand through his hair, shaking his head at her confession, "We're not punishing you, because you havent done anything wrong," he said as he frowned a little, thinking it was silly that she was blaming herself.
But then she asked a question that he hadnt expected, making him widen his eyes as he looked ahead. Was this something Amos had said? He felt himself getting a little angry, but then she put him back on track. He sighed deeply and looked down, "Maybe it's hard to explain, but we are just feeling some kind of way about you that we shouldnt. It's not the same love as the one you feel towards us," he then said as he looked at her with serious eyes. He took in a deep breath, feeling his heart a little heavy as he spoke, but it had to be said, "When you were just a baby, we were acting like your brothers, those who protected you. But now when you're... grown. We're feeling something that is forbidden. At least for a seraph, I dont know about Amos. But we're not supposed to feel like we want to be a boyfriend, because really, we're still your brothers, even if you're grown up now," he then tried to explain, rubbing the side of his face. He was glad he was the one who could have this conversation with her, since Amos apparently spoke of no strings, which was definitely the wrong approach.
"It's like we feel like we want to be to you what your parents are to eachother. It's alright for your parents, because they're both of different blood. But we're of your blood Saoirse. It's not allowed," he then said, thinking it was a better way to put it.

She felt a little relieved that he was finally talking to her, that he was explaining all of this nonsense in a way that she could kinda understand. However as he spoke of their love being different she frowned. "You're not making a lot of sense, I thought love was just love and that there wasn't different kinds?" she said, rather confused. She had gathered from Tyler that there could be the whole ordeal with the strings, but she thought that she loved just as anyone else. And now he was telling her that there were different kinds. It all was just a mess in her head. He went on to explain, and as he rubbed his face she reached up to take his hand so that he wouldn't rub so hard. She of course let go, even though she didn't want to. What she really wanted to was hold his hand and be close to him, but he clearly said that it couldn't be as such. As he spoke of her parents being together she seemed to understand somewhat, but she couldn't understand why it wasn't allowed.
"If it's forbidden, then why do I want to be close to you?" she asked in a frustrated voice. Breathing out she shook her head, wrapping her arms around herself again. "Is it because you're afraid our moms will get mad?" she asked, clearly not understanding fully what not allowed meant. "Because they shouldn't get mad if we are happy, right? My dad always says that as long as I'm happy, then he's happy," she said. Saoirse looked up as they stopped at a street crossing, waiting for the green man to appear that meant walk. She had learned that rather fast.

Her frustrated question seemed fine enough, but he wasnt sure if it was because she felt the same or simply because he had made a mess of thoughts in her head. "I'm not afraid. But they wouldnt want us to be together as a couple, because that's been deemed wrong by society. And it does make sense, because we should search to be with someone that hasnt been the one to change your diaper, or fed you or made sure you slept soundly at night," he then said, frowning a little at himself. He shook his head, looking up at the man all red, waiting for him to turn green. When he did, he continued.
"Love is love, but there are different aspects of how we love. You shouldnt love a brother in the same way you'd love a boyfriend. It's like... How does your dad love his sister?" he then asked, thinking that would be a good example. Well it probably wasnt because Baal and Alyssa had not seemed like the tight knitted kind of siblings, in fact he was certain he had never seen them hug ever. But it was still an example he was going to use, to explain the nuances. "And then, there's me and Tessa. We hug and show affection with funny trinkets or by buying each other's favourite things. But we dont kiss, we dont cuddle and sleep together in the same bed, because that's not when siblings do when they get older. It's a part of getting older," he then said.