To make things worse [cw]

[cw: sexual content, assault, abuse]

@Zaira <3

It had been a couple of weeks since the break up and Kurtis hadnt exactly been doing great. Well, in a sense he had to the outside world as slipping into his old habits kept him from actually having to deal with his pain. At least it was easier to just suck on whatever good feeling some first year girl had when his tongue was down her throat. He felt like a vampyre but for emotions and he hated himself. The news of their breakup didnt take long when people stopped seeing them together and new rumors about Kurtis seemingly moving onto new girls spread instead. The smirk on his father’s face whenever he was home, the mockery in asking how things were between Zaira and him, as if he wasnt just rubbing in that he felt like he could have predicted the outcome. It kept him up at night and he hadnt slept worse than he did these days, either not sleeping or having to scream into a pillow because god forbid that someone from this damned house should hear just how much in pain he really was. Abel had been back for quite some time now but talking to him or Jeremy had pretty much not been on Kurtis’ mind at all.

Abel stood by his locker, moving the steel frame that seemed to be a little rusty. He didnt notice Zaira approach him before she spoke to him, smiling softly at her as he nodded. He had missed her but it was quite obvious that she had fallen harder for Kurtis than she ever could him. So while the rumors were flowing around, he just kept low. “Y-y-yeah, sure. Let’s go somewhere w-where people wont l-listen.” He said, nodding for her to follow as he found an empty classroom. He held the door for her before he followed, making sure no one was looming around before closing the door. “H-how are y-y-you?” He asked, looking at her with a bit of worry in his eyes. She hadnt shown to be different except a little stiff in her emotions. Like she didnt really smile these days.

He had expected some kind of truth in the manner of her saying she wasnt okay or was like really sad. So when she confessed that she was pregnant he blinked a few times like he didnt really follow until he came back to reality. “Y-y-y-y-you’re…..?” he stammered like crazy, blinking and swallowing hard before he nodded instead of saying it. Pregnant? Now that was just not what he had been expecting at all. But then again was it ever. “A-a-and Kurtis?” He asked. Did the lycan know? Was this why they had broken up? If it was then he would be so angry. He could already feel some anger bubble up at the thought.

He never had to know? Abel only felt his worry rise as he still didnt know what had happened between them at all. Not that he actually imagied something bad but Kurtis could always somehow surprise. He nodded at her whisper, sighing as he pulled her in for a hug. “Y-y-yeah, it’s shit.” He said in a soothing voice. “Just do whatever you feel is right, you know?” He said in a lowered tone, not stuttering for once as he focused more on her well being and that made him think less about words. “Does y-your mom know?”

“How w-would you disappoint her? So, s-something happened, t-t-that’s just a risk w-when you h-have sex. It’s not l-l-like you’ve got a-a STD or s-something weird.” He argued because he couldnt see why she would feel that way. Not that he had any insight as a guy, but he was fairly reasonable and mature for his age. “I think t-that’s a good idea. J-just remember that you s-shouldnt d-do anything you are n-not comfortable w-with.” He assured her. “How long h-have you known? D-do you know f-for sure?”

And just then, a teacher opened the door, gasping as she saw the two students in the empty classroom, even if they werent standing close at this point, who would know what could happen. “Save all that for your free time, school is for learning!” She reprimanded them before pointing towards the door. “Dont make me send you to the principal.”

It was weird how he sometimes just wanted to remember how good things had been. Before his psycho father had decided to completely humiliate him in front of his girlfriend and then somehow expect that Kurtis would have had her stay in that mess. He sat in the library too as they were just reading some old history collection of how the world had changed. Next to him sat Abel, trying to draw a timeline of what they read. A girl approached then all giggly and not minding that it was a library at all. “So you share homework like you share your girls? Isnt that cute.” She said, walking over to sit on the table facing Kurtis. “Though it is nice that you’re not seeing anyone anymore.” She chuckled, reaching over to touch his collar. Kurtis just grabbed her hand and flung it away. “Shut the fuck up.” He hissed. Then he looked at Abel. “Is it true what everyone’s saying?” He asked, Abel frowning a little as he fiddled with the corner of the history book. “Abel!” Kurtis barked but his friend just smiled in a friendly manner at him. “If you really cared why did you break up with her in the first place?” He asked to which Kurtis rolled his eyes and looked back down into the book.

The fight didnt go unheard off as people were attracted to any kind of noise that seemingly seemed like the next juicy rumor. Some guys were passing by yelling about a girl fight but it wasnt tell one of them mentioned new girl that Abel looked up. He looked at Kurtis that just kept his eyes on the book. “R-r-really?” He asked as he got up. But he wasnt going to just let this slide. As thick skulled as the lycan seemed, he would stay in place like a rock if he wasnt kicked. In a literal sense that was. The girl had gone so it was just them. “F-fuck.” He mumbled, packing his bag before he drew in a deep breath. He then slapped the lycan, not hard but it also had to be felt. “What the fuck!” Kurtis exclaimed angrily, getting to his legs. “Good. N-now come along.” Abel said, grabbing the lycan and pulling him with him to where the fight seemingly happened. Seeing Zaira made his heart hurt so much but it wasnt like Kurtis would show that in school. Abel kept pulling him, telling him to help intervene. And eventually he did, reaching down to grab Zaira around her stomach and constrain her by pressing her back pretty close to his chest, prying her away from the girl if he had to. He had missed her so much but feeling her close only made him bitter right now. Abel stopped the girl from approaching them and as soon as it seemed that no more fighting would happen, people started going away. He put Zaira down when he felt like she would be calm enough to not just jump the girl again.

He didnt even really know what to say. Looking at her, he pretty much just wanted to pull her back in and hold her close again. Make things feel less shitty. But that is exactly what he couldnt do. He couldnt just do that to her knowing that she eventually would become so miserable being with him that she would leave on her own. Her defensive words made him swallow hard but she looked so far from fine. Had he really hurt her this much when he had broken up with her? It wasnt surprising but it had been easier to handle when he hadnt been seeing it. But his instincts kicked in and he moved closer just for her to yell at him, making people turn and stare as she ran off. He stood for a bit, stunned before he went and got his own things. But he just felt so shit. He looked at his phone, knowing he had two choices. The easiest would just go to some girl in his current rotation and do what he did best. But the way Zaira had looked at him was just stuck in his head. So he went to go look for her, heading outside.

“Zaira!” He called as he had spotted her and ran up to the school’s gates. She was walking off, was she hurt? He hadnt really felt how she had been in the moment but it also would have been way worse if he had. But he didnt know that, he was dumb as hell and just wanted to be sure she was fine. After weeks of not speaking at all. He just felt like this was a now or never moment. Either they didnt say a thing at all or they’d figure out a way to move on. Because that was it right? Neither of them were really moving on. Or maybe she was and he felt bitter for not being able to really do the same. He wasnt going to let her run off this time, that was for sure.

He approached her but not closer than she wanted him. How could he look at her differently than what she was to him? Though he hadnt even realized how he was looking at her until her plea. “Like what?” He asked with a small frown, her elaboration making him look a bit hurt. She was his whole world, wasnt that obvious from the time they had spent together? Her next question fuelled his guilt and he looked down. “You know damn well that I dont care about any of those girls like I care for you. So save me the bullshit.” He said, seeing the tears on her face. He carefully stepped closer, even if she didnt want him to. He wanted to be a bit selfish like he hadnt been the whole time. “You saw on a light scale what my life is like and you think I’d want you to be a part of that? Did you enjoy seeing me get fucking tortured? Where all those tears of joy?” He somewhat calmly asked rather than explaining himself. He stood in front of her now but kept his hands to himself. “Zaira I love you. And nothing can ever change that.” - “But I know my family. And how fucked up they are. And I’d rather end things while they are good than watch you slowly hate me more than you’d ever love me.”

Her question made him frown as he couldnt believe she was even asking that. It wasnt a matter of whether it was going to last but of all the things he wanted for her, letting his own father tyrannize her was not an option. Sure he hadnt hurt her but when would she not give a good enough reaction? When would he start hurting her to get back at Kurtis? She muttered and he noticed how she was feeling worse, though he didnt know what was going on. “I know, and I’m fucking sorry, but please dont fucking just…. Shit!” He spoke as she fell, he just barely grabbed her arms and kept her from hitting her head on the ground. He held her hands but let go as he wasnt sure what he was feeling from her. He couldnt just leave her out here so he bowed down to pick her up. “Dont! I’ve g-got it!” Abel yelled, pushing the lycan away as he picked up the human instead. “What are you doing?” - “T-t-taking care of Zaira.” Abel answered in a flat tone, feeling how cold she was getting. “G-g-give her your jacket.” - “Kurtis n-now!” He demanded, the lycan gritting his teeth but doing it anyway. He placed the jacket over Zaira and Abel made sure it would keep her warm. “T-thanks.” Abel said before walking off with her, not sure where really to take her, but he ended up taking her to his home. His sister was still in America but her bed was there and he placed Zaira in it. He let her keep the jacket he had made Kurtis hand over, grabbing a chair before he sat down next to her and just waited.

Abel had dozed off as well into his chair but he was more resting than sleeping. So he came to his senses as soon as he heard Zaira rustling around, sitting up with a sigh and a yawn to follow. It was quiet between them but Abel wasnt really the type to find silence awkward. She spoke and he shook his head. She had nothing to apologize for at all. “I’m here for you because you s-s-still mean a lot to me. And I’m not going to care what the rumors s-say. I cared in the b-beginning w-when everyone was m-m-making fun of me for being a v-virgin or my s-stutter. Now I-I dont care.” He admitted, chuckling a little before he shook his head. He folded his hands and rolled his thumbs a bit. “H-he almost picked you u-up but I pushed h-him away. I hope t-that’s okay.”